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Fascination with celebrities creating atmosphere of ‘Miley-itis’

Gerry Wachovsky

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National obsessions have reached an all-time high. Something needs to change.

It is OK to follow the life of a celebrity such as being interested in whatever island nation Amy Winehouse is currently hiding on. More often, however, celebrity obsessions are becoming dangerous. Suddenly, a seemingly harmless interest turns into a maniacal game.

Those of us who aren’t teenage girls may not be aware of the following catastrophic news. Miley Cyrus has done the unthinkable. She has quit posting to her Twitter account. Now, a life hangs in the balance.

I don’t know if this is a publicity stunt, but assuming it is true, this story is pretty damn psychotic.

A crazed Miley fan has started a Web site called MileySaveFuzzy.com, where a simple threat looms: If Miley doesn’t return to Twitter and begin updating fans about the mindless minutiae of her life, this person will cook and eat their own cat.

The coward does not provide a name on the Web site, yet this troglodyte throws around arrogant quips such as, “Cooking a cat is not illegal in my country, in fact it’s part of our culture.” If this is not an illegal act in whatever underdeveloped nation this person lives in, they should come out and announce who they are. If there is no worry that they will be arrested for animal cruelty, there’s no reason to hide.

“Ultimately, Miley is the only one who has the power to save Fuzzy.” If animal cruelty isn’t illegal where this person lives, surely blackmail is. Besides the legal ramifications of this threat — if it is true — let us consider the other issues. Why are Miley’s “tweets” so crucial to humanity? Why does a helpless cat needs to suffer if the world is denied such insight into everything Cyrus?

This is a problem with today’s society. People have convinced themselves that the celebrities they follow so closely actually give a crap about them. If MileySaveFuzzy.com makes true on its threat, it sets a terrible precedent. How far can a fan go to get whatever idiotic demands they want from their favorite icon?

Michael Jackson was no stranger to maniacal fans. According to Sky News, at least 12 suicides were reported after some fans just couldn’t go on living knowing that their idol was dead.

Luckily for us, those 12 cretins weeded themselves out. But what about the ones that are still among us? No doubt they all flocked to the theaters to be the first to see “This Is It,” the documentary released last weekend chronicling “Jacko’s” final preparation for his sold-out London shows.

Is the “King of Pop” ever going to be able to rest in peace? How much more could there possibly be to learn about the pop star who liked children a little too much? How many documentaries and “untold stories” does the public have to endure before the mania is over?

When people get obsessed with stars like Cyrus and Jackson, it really makes me wonder if these are really the most pressing issues in these people’s lives?

What about the destruction of our economy? People seem to care more about whatever child Angelina Jolie has adopted this week. What about the fact that President Obama is reaching the end of his first year in office and he still hasn’t done anything? That doesn’t matter when Miley Cyrus remains “tweetless.”

It seems that priorities aren’t being kept in check. I’m not saying to ignore all pop culture or to disregard celebrities entirely. I’m saying to remember what every alcohol advertisement says: “Do it in moderation.”

And if Fuzzy does get killed and eaten because Miley doesn’t comply with this loser’s demand, I hope the person gets dealt with in an extreme manner — and I’m not ruling out capital punishment. People need a wake up call.

Gerry Wachovsky is a graduate student and columnist for the Daily 49er.

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