The incident wherein Ray Rice viciously assaulted his fiancée in an elevator conceals a much deeper story. Violence against women remains an epidemic. Although our society has made improvements on this front, we still have a tremendously long way to go.
Violence against women has been prevalent in far too many societies, yet, while browsing the Internet, one can still find news articles with the headline: “Can Ray Rice Ultimately be Forgiven?”
Yeah, that’s right. A man punches his wife and renders her unconscious. Naturally, our first question is whether we can forgive him.
It’s a frightening time to be a woman, but I suppose that’s not a new story either.
It’s a perverse, male-dominated society we live in – that should go without saying – and with the way the current NFL scandal is being covered by all of the abuse apologists, this problem must be brought to the forefront of the American political and social discourse. Many people will make this claim: “he isn’t the only man who has abused his wife,” as though that makes things better, as though that suddenly absolves Ray Rice of his crime against his wife, women and humanity
According to the NCDV, the societal cost of intimate partner violence exceeds $8.3 billion each year. Additionally, between 21-60 percent of these victims lose their job as a result of such abuse. The NCDV also reports that out of America’s population size of over 300 million, approximately 42.4 million “have either experienced rape, physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner.” It’s safe to say that the Ray Rice incident illustrates a much more insidious and widespread problem which must be urgently addressed by the NFL and society at large.
The victim of Rice’s assault, Janay Palmer Rice, has made the choice to stand by her husband. I won’t assert that it’s anyone’s business to judge a victim’s decision; however, to use her own forgiveness of Rice as a mitigating factor for Rice’s heinous crime is absurd. Victims will stay with their abusers for many reasons; however, that does not excuse their abuser’s actions.
Even the Baltimore Ravens are guilty of contributing to America’s failure to take domestic violence seriously. Back in May, when the only footage we had to formulate our opinions from was Rice dragging her limp body out of the elevator, the Ravens officially tweeted that, “Janay Rice says she deeply regrets the role that she played the night of the incident.”
Ray Rice is an abuser. There is no reason to excuse him for his own actions, and there is no reason to feel sympathy for him. The sympathy we feel for abusers is what results in widespread rape and other forms of violence against women, and why do we do it? Why do we insist on defending this man by excusing his actions?
It’s a frightening time to be a woman, but I suppose that’s not a new story either.