Opinions

The Monogamous Tinder Experience

Is it okay for a married couple, or even those in a committed relationship, to have a Tinder account?

Tinder is an online dating app through which potential dates and relationships can be found, and it is often associated with the hook-up culture.   It makes finding casual sex much simpler, especially due to the location-based services. Though it can also be a great app with which to make friends.

It’s simple. A Tinder account only has an individual’s name, age, a few photos and a small biography. It uses GPS to locate potential dates. An individual’s account pops up on the phone screen, and one can either swipe right to “like” or left to “pass.” If a potential date also likes your account, then bingo, there’s a match, at which point, the two individuals can begin messaging instantly. It’s fun to use and easily accessible worldwide; currently, Tinder is available in 24 languages and creates around 10 million matches a day.

Mark Zuckerberg once created the website facemash.com to allow for users to judge between two randomly chosen photos of female Harvard students; the website urged voters to decide who was the “hotter” of the two. It inevitably led to what is now Facebook.

It is our human nature to judge others. Tinder allows for just that; you judge other people without the consequence of them knowing. Are they hot? Are they better looking than me? Will they be okay with just hooking up? Are these photos photo-shopped?

So, to answer the golden question of whether it is acceptable for committed couples to use Tinder, I had to personally create an account. It was easy. I downloaded the free app and it synced up with my Facebook; in 3 minutes time, I had a functioning Tinder account.

I went about using the app and began my journey of judging the men that appeared on my phone screen merely by their photos. Some were strikingly attractive; some looked like they were my father’s age. I did get some “matches” and messages from individuals who liked my account. The fact that some people thought I was pretty enough to like and/or message was exhilarating, though I’ll admit it was a petty form of satisfaction.

No one really tells you that once you put a diamond ring on your left ring finger, the opposite sex’s attention gets diverted elsewhere. Tinder surprisingly added an ego-boost that I imagine many others feel, as well, when they receive a match.

My most embarrassing experience on Tinder was when I was matched up with my fiancé’s mutual friend; my explanation to him was that I was using it as an experiment for this article, which seemed like a sad excuse for a possible adulterous rendezvous.

Overall, the demographic of Tinder users is young, single individuals. The app was created to cater to the single, tech-savvy, young-adult crowd. Married couples should not be using this app, and the same goes for committed couples that are not in an open relationship.

As an engaged-woman in her 20s, I feel a twinge of jealousy for this new social media craze. It is the very first form of social media that I cannot partake in, but if you’re looking for a meaningful relationship, Tinder is not the place.

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